day 88

Whether it's work, school, love, eating, exercise, etc. each of us has experienced being "stuck in a rut". More and more I realize that you can tell a lot about a person, especially yourself, by the way we dig ourselves out of those ruts. Some people simply fall victim to the ups and downs life throws at them. Others get by, but don't necessarily thrive. Then there are those that seem to prosper no matter what obstacles they encounter. It's easy to say that these people in the latter group are "lucky" or "fortunate," but I believe they make a deliberate and constant effort to be driven and purposeful in their everyday lives. Even someone who is born into money, opportunity and/or privilege can quickly ruin it and fall into the victim mentality. (This is not to say that the only definition/key to happiness or success is money and privilege, I'm making generalizations to avoid being long-winded like this sentence.)

I think the first reaction to a problem is to feel sorry for yourself. Your car breaks down, "Why me?" Your Facebook is full of others thrilling accomplishments, "Wow, I'm worthless." Or, if you're like me, you take the self-defense route out and start mentally hating on them. I have caught myself doing that - I really hope I'm not the only one. But at least I caught myself; if I'm jealous there's no reason to hate. I should learn from others and push myself harder towards my goals.

I've hit some ruts throughout my first 88, but not as many as I would have expected. As I am nearing the quarter-year mark (wow!), I starting assessing the progress I've made.

Learning Spanish was one of the activities I wanted to dedicate a lot of my newfound time to after cutting out drinking. In the spirit of honesty, I'm going to guesstimate my time spent on Spanish thus far at 6 hours. Pathetic. Rut. I will be improving this in the 2nd quarter of sobriety. So far I'll give myself a D grade, need for improvement.

Exploring the Buddhist faith is a huge interest of mine, and another hobby I wanted to indulge in this year. Although I haven't tackled this directly, I have explored my spirituality and thoughts more than EVER. I am happy to say my beliefs are evolving and taking on new colors and shapes. Although I occasionally think deep enough to worry myself into a sleepless night, I love that I am still inquisitive and open minded. Grade B, still need to narrow in on specific research instead of solely self-exploration.

Reading is a new leisure activity I've picked up in the past year (thanks to my brother who gave me the Hunger Games trilogy). Since my birthday, I've read at least 10 books and have another 100 I want to download. I love my kindle - if you don't have, one BUY one. Turning the TV on is the easy option, but reading a book is so much more rewarding. I also find that I have a more restful sleep when I read instead of watch TV; not sure of the exact cause/correlation there. So on my reading hobby, I'll give myself a B+. (Patting myself on the back.)

Working out and eating right were healthy choices that I wanted to coincide with my decision to stop drinking. This has been a huge focus of mine and a big success. In 3 months I have lost approximately 30 pounds. I started weighing 5 weeks in and I am down 15 pounds since that point, I am having to guess the first 5 weeks weight loss based on clothing. I recently hired a personal trainer who has stepped up my workouts and thrown an added curve ball into my eating plan. I am extremely happy with my progress and cannot wait to see the changes to come in the next quarter! I also feel absolutely wonderful. I never want to have a hangover again. I now go to bed excited to wake up early for the gym, instead of dreading how terrible I'll feel when that alarm beeps. I'll give myself an A in healthy living. (Wow, I'm really grading myself. Lame.)

I think I also deserve an A for not drinking. I've managed a birthday celebration, a friend's visit, a tropical storm weekend, a weekend in Miami, a weekend in Atlanta, a weekend in STL, NFL season, a Miami hurricanes football game, a Cardinals game, 88 possible happy hours and 88 possible Zinfandel night caps. Up next - sober Fantasy Fest. After that week, I'll definitely deserve an A+!

In the next three months, I will continue my current progress while striving to further myself in other areas. I absolutely want to run a 5k, improve my "grade" in Spanish, read a book on buddhism and start volunteering. No matter what I encounter along the way, I will keep on pushing!